Because you can't find it anywhere else

Category: Math

For the love of the Gaussian function: a lonely math major crunches the numbers

Somewhere there’s a someone for everyone
Somewhere there’s a someone for me

Though I may be lonely now

I’ll see it through somehow
To someone’s heart I know I hold the key

–Dean Martin, “Somewhere There’s a Someone,” 1966

But was old Dean right in his assertion? The fact that he spoke in such certainties when mathematics and modern physics seem to tell us, in stereo, that the only certainty in the universe is the lack thereof is unnerving to me. His words beg the question: is there really a someone? Somewhere? For me?

Perhaps even in this very university?