Thank you for happening, this.
Archive for the 'Crime' Category
Lakeview Terrace is a chilling tale about the dangers of suburban life. Samuel L. Jackson plays Abel “Jordan” Turner, a single father struggling to raise two children in a world of moral corruption and bad grammar. When a newly married couple moves in next door to his house on Lakeview Circle, AJT doesn’t think much of it. But it’s not long before Tariq’s new neighbors are asking him to turn off his security lights (his only defense against the dangerous lowlifes that prowl Lakeview at night), parking illegally, having sex in front of his kids, entering his house, and generally threatening his safety, family, and way of life. As a police officer, Abdullah-Jamal begins to sense the danger posed by his new neighbors and their criminal lifestyle, but it may be too late for him to stop them from taking, WHAT EVER they want.
With its gripping cinematic style, crisp dialogue, and flawless acting, Lakeview Terrace paints a terrifying picture of a worst-case scenario of neighborhood relations. It seems there are several lessons to be learned from this film and its portrayal of Elijah’s ordeal:
- You can never trust your neighbors, no matter how young and vibrant they seem to be.
- Sometimes, when dealing with truly twisted minds, even being stubborn and annoying can’t save you.
- Only you can prevent forest fires.
- I’m the police; you have to do what I say.
ESPN commercial from a couple years ago.
Attentive readers may have noticed the appearance of a new Twitter sidebar on this otherwise flawless website. We’re having management look into it; hopefully it’s not indicative of a larger problem with our servers. We’ll get back to you as soon as more information becomes available.
It’s not all bad news today, though. I am proud to announce the debut of the official Obscure Porn Twitter! You can subscribe at www.twitter.com/obscureporn. It will be your up-to-the-minute source for all news obscure and pornographic, and possibly neither. Our correspondents are working around the clock to provide you with the latest coverage of them working around the clock. You don’t want to miss this. Starring Brad Pitt and Kate Hudson, with Eric Hysen as the gnome who sells them weed.
We’re still apparently distributing spyware…
Anyone have any ideas? We’re running the latest version of WordPress, so there shouldn’t be any security holes…
So I’ve been on codeine for a couple days now. For those of you not in the know, it’s Project Pat’s drug of choice and one of the key ingredients in Sizurp, also known as “Purple Drank.”
A review will be forthcoming. Suffice it to say that the works of Paul Wall, especially his chopped and screwed remixes, make a lot more sense now.
i hope yall know spanish cuz theres no subtitles
Today marks the one year anniversary of Mary Worth’s disappearance from the Washington Post. If you have seen Ms. Worth, please contact the Washington Post comics department or the Mary Worth Anti-Cancellation Committee at once. Mary Worth is described as a meddling old biddy, age mid-70s, between 5′0 and 5′4. Her favored activities include meddling, advice-giving, adopting other people’s pets, trips to Vietnam, sending other people on trips to Vietnam, and causing Captain Kangaroo look-alikes to drive off a cliff.
If you have any information as to her whereabouts, please call the tip line at 1-800-MEDDLER.
Man, I am very into coming up with awesome ideas, but being unable to carry them to fruition.
[1:20] <Mantas> help me think of some of the stuff we did
[1:20] <Mantas> the crazy plans
[1:21] <Mantas> that never got finished
[1:21] <Grog> there are so many
[1:21] <Grog> nigh-infinity
Let’s have a list of some of the ones I remember:
Cookies for everyone funding, ninja outfits, making our own coca cola, graffiti, making an AIM AI with a true personality, Parkour, 3D Pool, “Grammar Team vs. The Murder Monkey”, making a 3 foot ballista capable of firing a ping pong ball into a brick wall, Bacon Fridays, the Zelda MAN skit, The fully physics programmed “Gullivers Travels 2: Gullivers Revenge” stick figure fighting game, making obscureporn.com, engaging in a Spartan training program, hacking/ questionably legal stuff, my kickass gigantic capture the flag game, flaming nunchaku/whip, the Caleb Survival Guide, telling Henry Scher he is Caleb, the Triumvirate of me nick and david, the Great Trip, the Lesser Trip, Thermite, Neo-Darwinian Dogma, write a comic for silver chips, This versus That, changing construction road signs, senior magnet picnic, etc.
Now, by no means have I given up on any of these. I just don’t usually remember them enough to make any forward progress with them.
i will continue adding to this list if i remember more
I love stories like this one. No, not because I’m a fan of anonymous gay bathroom sex, you sick freak. But because this story, about Idaho Senator Larry Craig, and similar ones, featuring this guy and this guy, are finally revealing that a common sense rule of thumb applies to American politics – the guy with the biggest car, biggest house, and, well, biggest everything, is probably compensating for something.
In this case, it takes the form of family values. Why is it that the latest three Congressional sex scandals have involved not just Republicans, whose party declares family values as one of its main issues, but the select Republicans who made family values their main issues. According to Wikipedia, “In the House, [Mark] Foley was one of the foremost opponents of child pornography.” He then proceeded to solicit cyber-sex with teenage Congressional pages. Next up, David “Vitter believes strongly that marriage is a sacred vow between a man and a woman. In 2003, Vitter proposed to amend the U.S. Constitution to ban same sex marriages.” Turns out the real threat to his marriage was a prostitute.
Finally, we come to my favorite, good old Larry Craig. Wikipedia says “Craig supported the Federal Marriage Amendment, which barred extention of rights to same-sex couples; he voted for cloture on the amendment in both 2004 and 2006. Craig voted against cloture on a in 2002 which would have extended the federal definition of hate crimes to cover sexual orientation.” Take a minute to let that soak in. First, he supported denying basic marriage rights to gays. Alright, fairly standard of many Republicans. But beyond that, he voted against labeling crimes against gays as hate crimes. Now for the kicker – he’s been dealing with allegations of being gay (and seeking sex with Congressional pages and random passerby) for over 25 years!
Now I stress that these are just allegations. Everyone, including (alleged) scumbags like these, has a right to due process. And I’m not saying that Democrat’s can’t be scum either. But these guys are just dumb. I’ll leave Foley and Vitter out of it for now, but let’s take a closer look at Larry Craig.
The man was arrested by an undercover police officer on June 11th. He didn’t plead guilty until August 8th. AUGUST EIGHTH! TWO FREAKING MONTHS! So once the guilty plea made the news this week, what was his response? I quote, “I chose to plead guilty to a lesser charge in the hope of making it go away. I did not seek any counsel, either from an attorney, staff, friends, or family. That was a mistake, and I deeply regret it.”
You’re a UNITED STATES SENATOR – one of the most powerful men in the country. You have been a crusader against gay rights for years, while simultaneously dealing with allegations of improper homosexual conduct. So after being arrested for allegations of improper homosexual conduct, with two months to think about what you’re going to do, you think that this type of thing will just “go away?” And you think that pleading guilty will make it go away faster?
For the sake of argument, let’s assume this guy is 100% innocent and did make a mistake by pleading guilty. Even if that’s the case, Senator Craig has given the voters of Idaho a crystal-clear reason not to send him back to Washington if he chooses to seek reelection in 2008 – HE’S A MORON.
Or maybe Idahoans will reelect Craig, to keep this (alleged) twisted hypocrite hundreds of miles away in Washington, and the hell out of their state.
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