Because you can't find it anywhere else

Category: Quotes

I'm pretty sure I'm just getting trolled at this point

http://www.cracked.com/article_18757_5-things-you-wont-believe-arent-in-bible.html
It turns out, the common description of Satan, with horns and a pitchfork and all that, doesn’t actually come from the Bible. In fact, “he’s just a disembodied ghost-voice, kind of like a really evil Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

STAR WARS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS AT ALL. STAR WARS DOES NOT NEED TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS AT ALL.

Ok and to make matters worse, the comparison doesn’t even make any fucking sense. For one thing, Obi-Wan is alive during 4 or 5 of the Star Wars movies. Furthermore, (and I’m forced to guess based on pictures given in the Cracked article because I am mildly normal and not obsessed with Star Wars), it looks like, when Obi-Wan appears in the movies after his death, HE’S STILL NOT DISEMBODIED. He appears as a ghostlike slightly transparent memory thing, but he definitely has a body.

February 1st 2007-2009

beaver, cleaver, cleavage, Janet Jackson, nipple, titties, biddies, Vietnam, Dr. Jeff Cory, Dr. House, Dr. Cox, J.D., Turk, Saudi Arabia, Iraq, Saddam Hussein, Osama bin Laden, Barack Hussein Obama, Hillary Clinton, Charles Schumer, pair of shoes, let’s get some shoes, $300, the 300, Sin City, Las Vegas, CSI, NYPD Blue, David Caruso, David Hu, The Who, Keith Moon, Marty Moon, person of indeterminate gender wearing a fur-trimmed jacket even though he or she is inside, Stormy Hicks, The Perfect Storm, George Clooney, Rosemary Clooney, thyme, Simon and Garfunkel, Garfield, Taft, Hoover, Dyson, suction cup, black holes, Elliot, My Name Is Shiotani, My Name Is Earl, 30 Rock, The Office, Office Space, Ron Livingston, Sprint, Nextel, Nextel Cup, Jeff Gordon, Tide, Darrell Waltrip, Daryl Hanna, Hanna Barbera, his son Elroy, Jack Elrod, elbow, macaroni, martini, vodka, Mantas, map, mop, janitor, actor, Neil Flynn, Neil Armstrong, Lance Armstrong, Sheryl Crow, Counting Crows, Count von Count, Big Bird, Snuffleupagus, Grover, Grosvenor, Strathmore, Trish Stratus, Vince McMahon, manatee, humanity, Hugh Grant, Hugh Laurie, Omar Epps, Omar Stoutmire, Oscar Mayer, Healthy Choice, pro-choice, pro-life, Life magazine, Life board game, life sentence, Lyfe Jennings, Ken Jennings, Alex Trebek, Sean Connery, James Bond, Ali G, Borat, Kazakhstan, USSR, Russia, RGSD, Vladimir Hyder, Alex Hyder, Alexander the Great, Hagar the Horrible, Attila the Hun, super hunch, Super Freak, Little Miss Sunshine, Steve Carell, Will Ferrell, David Koechner, Snakes on a Plane, Samuel L. 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Quoth the Raven: Nevermore

Guys, I’m all out of quotes, except for the one that I used for the title (Edgar Allan Poe). Actually I’m just really lazy, umm if I get enough feedback from people who want me to continue this feature, then I might continue, otherwise sayonara (also my biggest idol just discontinued his feature and I don’t know how to go on doing my feature anymore, even though it required little if any effort at all). Also I’m too silly of a person to keep doing serious quotes, so maybe I’ll change the format and make the quotes funnier? But probably not. Instead of reading what people have said, my suggestion to you, the reader, is to go out and say things yourself, so that you won’t have to rely on others who are mostly dead for inspiration and you can find it in your own life wherefore it more directly applies to thou… I mean you. So I lied… here is my last quote:

“Goodbye.”

– Michael Stamm

Quote of the Week #8

Again sorry about the lateness.

“I came to the conclusion long ago … that all religions were true and also that all had some error in them, and whilst I hold by my own, I should hold others as dear as Hinduism. So we can only pray, if we are Hindus, not that a Christian should become a Hindu … But our innermost prayer should be a Hindu should be a better Hindu, a Muslim a better Muslim, a Christian a better Christian.”

– Mohandas Gandhi