right on time
Recommendation for Vince [redacted]
To Whom It May Concern:
Vince █████ is a 90-year old bear who lives in a cave near MIT. I would trust him with my, and several freshmen’s, lives. Just as long as they’re not coated in honey. However, if they are coated in honey, could you please send them over to my place instead? My honeyjar is already about half-empty. But anyway, back to Vince, the great thing about him is that he would probably say that my honeyjar is half-full of delicious honey for him to eat. Admittedly, he does talk about honey a little too much, but that’s only in this recommendation. Yeah, he’s writing this- I mean, I’m writing this, but we’re essentially the same person. This is why I would trust him not only to guard my life, but also to live it. In conclusion, it’s hard to overstate the importance of hiring Vince for this position. OK, it’s not that hard, I mean I could just say something like “not hiring Vince is the leading cause of death in the Northeast.” That sounds like hyperbole, and it is, but what isn’t hyperbole is that Vince is the leading cause of honey-related injuries in this letter. And if that doesn’t qualify him to lead an expedition up Mt. Dew, then I don’t know what does. Well, maybe some mountain-climbing expertise would help. But I’m pretty sure he’s got that too- what bear doesn’t?
Vince █████ for Class Treasurer 2009,
Ben Strauss
It's A Wrap… I Mean Rap
Ok so to increase activity on this site Mantas and I thought up a new game which is like a group rap. Ok so the first person writes a line, then the second person has to make a line to rhyme with the previous one, and make a new line of their own. Ok so to start you guys off i wrote the first line and mantas wrote the next two. Ok so just to make sure every comment should be in the form of two lines, the first of which rhymes with the second line of the previous comment. Ok so if you guys wanna do this when you are fucked up it’s fine with me. Ok so the official rules of who gets to comment when are that you should comment when you feel like you have a “good one” (the criteria of which is up to you and subject to no scrutiny by myself or other persons thus engaged in the activity), and also don’t do two in a row, in otherwords don’t rhyme with your own lines, in other other words don’t comment on your own comment.
Ok so here goes, and seriously if no one comments i actually won’t really mind that much, but ben since you always get the first comment ok so your comment better be pretty good, and it better be ok so in the format previously prescribed by ok so me. Ok so also if you guys could use the comma period format so the first line in a couplet ends in a comma and the second in period, that means in your post your first line will end in a period and your second in a comma.
Ok so:
I know this guy Ben and he is really dumb,
When I ask him a question all he ever says is “umm”.
He looks like a mouse and his head is made of styrofoam,
looks like one of our writers is a TRAITOR
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/newfood/
scroll down until you find someone you recognize
ps. if you hit “straus” keep going. there’s another.
bigtime updates
i would like them
– The Site
Absolutely the most absurd thing ever
This is how they chose the new Pepsi logo. Actually. This is hundreds of millions of dollars of research right here.
Download the document
from Gawker
Wordle
It counts the most commonly used words. I’m not for sure buying it though, since it didn’t pick up “Podcast”…
Podcast 36: There's No Time
fatal error when installing wordpress 2.7.1 WTF IS UP WITH THAT ERIC
Jam of the Month: February '09
I’m starting a new feature here on Obscure Porn. It’s called Jam of the Month. I think it’s pretty self explanatory.
Anyway, here is February’s Jam of the Month.
B.o.B – “I’ll Be in the Sky”
new OP desktop
