Because you can't find it anywhere else

Cheating Made Easy

So the other day I went to a magic act. The venue was a darkened room, it was about the size of a hallway. The paint on the walls was chipping, and the floor was concrete. There was a single table at the end. A shadeless bulb hung over the table, illuminating it. The whole time I was wondered if this was an elaborate act to get random people into an isolated area to mug them. I’m sure there was at least one pickpocket among them.

This was an act specifically based on deception with playing cards, and the table was where the example card games would be played. There weren’t even chairs for watching. The audience (of 4 people) stood.

The illusionist was a 40-something guy wearing a Hawaiian shirt and slacks. He seemed out of place. He began talking some card history and handed some decks out to be shuffled. He started off with a small demo of 3 Card Monte. Being an amateur Monte practitioner, I was intrigued. Even though I knew exactly what he was doing, he managed to trick me. At one point the cards even changed. He was wearing short sleeves. I decided this guy was legit.

After that he got to the fun parts. He would take a shuffled deck, shuffle it a few times, and have the audience call out random cards that he would then whip out of the deck without looking at the card faces. At one point through his casual shuffling, he had arranged the entire deck into an order he had memorized. This is all basically an introduction to me talking about something completely different.

The book this guy learned all of his crazy mind games from a book called The Expert at the Card Table by S. W. Erdnase. Erdnase isn’t a real person, and nobody knows who it really was. I believe he was a ninja. Anyway, the book gives detailed info on how to pull off slight of hand tricks for use with any card game that involves….cards. So it is useful.

Now I know what most of you are going to say.

“Why would I shell out $8 for a potentially life changing skill set?” Because it gets you girls, thats why.

“If this book is so good, why doesn’t everyone know about it?” Because it is old. Over a century old, in fact. I guess people forgot about it.

“If it’s so old, how could it possibly apply?” Because card games still use cards.

“Wont other people knowing about this negate my ability to use the slight of hand?” No, because even if you know how to use the techniques, they are so good that even professionals can not see them. WHAT YOU SAY? Yes, that’s right. They are so perfect, they can not even be seen by the people who apply them.

So go out and read this book guys. Next week we can have a poker game.

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3 Comments

  1. this will be the greatest poker game known to man. I am confident that we will each have a royal flush every single hand

  2. so um how much did this guy pay you to advertise his book like this? i know you’re desperate for money but jeez, you’d think you would make enough by cheating at poker. also i really like that you are spending your free time seeing magic acts in alleys. that’s pretty cool.

  3. Apparently this guy that wrote the book wrote it 100 years ago… But if he wrote it 100 years ago how can we read it? No language that is still spoken today was spoken back then so how can we learn what knowledge it contains? Its impossible thats how. Thats how i know this book doesn’t exist. Thats how i know you weren’t in an alley seeing a magic act. Thats how i know your true identity. You cant hide much longer.

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